Talking Dogs

My prior parenting experience comes exclusively from the mothering of one small dog.

A lot of you probably have dogs or (cringe) cats who you love very dearly. Maybe you’ve been together for a while now: 3 year, 5 years, 10 years. Surely at this stage, you have begun talking to your pets. Admit it, when you are alone with them (or not) you talk to them, even though they can’t talk back.

But… could you imagine if they could? What if I told you that in a short 18 months time, your dog would begin to speak to you. It would start small, like a mild "gaga" or even "mama." But then soon it would be words and sentences and profanity, until finally, one day, after all these years, you’d say something like “Who wants to go for a walk?” And your dog would reply "I do you stupid motherfucker."

I imagine this will be what it feels like when the frittata begins to speak back to me.